Was George Washington Really the Founding Father... of Weed?

George Washington – American Founding Father. First in war, first in peace, and first in the hearts of his countrymen. And also, a first hemp farmer. No, really. Not THE first, perhaps, but one of the first. Washington, along with Thomas Jefferson, were both apparently hemp farmers, as well as growing tobacco. Washington grew it in a spot on his land he referred to as the Muddy Hole. 

Maybe that’s why he supposedly chopped down that cherry tree – he needed more land for hemp. Hey, it could have happened that way.

Before you get too patriotic, waving your medical marijuana card around while singing "From Vernon's Mount Behold The Hero Rise", we should probably take a closer look.

Yes, Washington cultivated hemp on his farm, but it wasn’t used for what many use it for today, if you catch our drift. It was used for several things, none of which required inhaling. (See Clinton, Bill, 1992) For example, the fibers made for strong rope and sail canvas. Sort of like the nylon of the 18th Century. We said strong rope, not strong dope. 

If it was actually dope, not rope, Washington may never have successfully crossed the Delaware and the famous painting would have depicted something more akin to a college frat party. We can picture members often continental army on the boat with him:

“Hey, G-Dub. Dude! Sit down. Take a load off. It’s kind of cold out here. Where are the brownies? How about some tacos? Is it true that the British are called red coats because they have, like, you know, red coats and stuff? Whoa! I need a nap.”

 We would have lost the war and today we’d be singing “God Save the King” before football games, instead of the national anthem, not to mention saluting Prince Andrew.

But we digress. Okay, we get that Washington was not a saint. But, it was the 18th century and they didn’t have some of today’s sensibilities, like hip-hop or online sports betting. Besides, he grew hemp. That alone should get him some kind of pass in today’s society.